my 600 pound life
Casting stones is something we all do to some extent whether we want to be honest with ourselves or not.
“Look at that person smoking. Just put it down and stop. That’s all it takes.”
“Man, getting a flat so soon? I’d just quit.”
These are things that have been said to me. It’s been more than a decade since I’ve smoked, and the second comment was made when my bicycle had a flat just one mile into an eighty mile ride. That one was rough. People kept passing by snickering and pointing and making horrible comments. I finished that ride but their comments were demoralizing and really hurt.
And even though I know how comments like that can hurt, I’ve caught myself doing it too. I’ve found though, that if you turn the comment back on yourself, you may find things out about yourself that needs fixing. For example, the most common place for me to cast stones is while watching the show My 600 Pound Life. Sure, they can’t hear me so what’s the harm right? Uh… no. I can hear me. I’ve found myself saying things like, “Why are you eating that? Don’t you know you are killing yourself?” For this person it may be true. The doc is always telling them that they don’t have much longer to live if they stay at this weight, but couldn’t this apply to anyone of any weight? Not just someone who is 600 pounds? I mean, how many useful calories are there in a pint of ice cream? And don’t say, “Hey, there’s milk in there.”
Ever since that revelation dawned on me I’ve turned the question back on myself when I’m eating badly. “Why are you eating that? Don’t you know you are killing yourself?” I’ve noticed that it reminds me of something back when I used to smoke cigarettes. I remember going to bed and asking myself, “Why did I smoke so many cigarettes today? I feel horrible. Why do I keep doing this?” And then then next morning the first thing on my mind was getting outside so that I could smoke a cigarette. It makes no sense. Smoking is an addiction and you can get caught in a logical loop that gets you nowhere when you try to solve the question. Addictions aren’t logical. Recently I’ve started asking myself at night why I ate like I did that day and that reminded me of my smoking days.
Maybe this is the way to battle my love of food. Treat it like my smoking addiction. The idea alone tires me out. It’s a hard road full of mental arguments. For me, quitting smoking was 20% physical addiction and 80% mental addiction. I had to figure out what made me want to smoke and decide what I could do in place of smoking. I smoked because I was bored, it was time to smoke (work breaks), I was angry or frustrated, I was driving, I deserved it as a reward, and of course the popular one, after sex. With smoking I replaced the cigarette with a drink of water and imagined that the drink of water was cleansing my body. With each drink I was getting healthier. Hey, it worked.
So what are my triggers to eat? And what can I do in place of eating? I’m going to work on listing these out this week and post them along with my plan next week. I’m also going to do some research as well. I’ve realized that even though I’m not 600 pounds, that I too am killing myself with food and that I have a long road of mental re-programming, but it feels good to have a plan that seems to click for me.
If you catch yourself casting stones this week, try turning it back around, and see if you learn something about yourself. How can you use that to improve?
Eat Well and Prosper!